It's The Little Things

It’s The Little Things

Usually when I write blogs, they can be full of angst.  Even when I am not in a depressive state, I tend to be more introspective, and that can bring on feelings that aren’t always joyful.  So while I’m still in a state of limbo (neither up nor down) I’m feeling pretty good in general.  I’m appreciating the little things, which during this time are really awfully big things.

I have a family who loves and supports me and friends who do the same.  I have a daughter I love more than life itself.  I have a puppy who is my spoiled little baby who showers me with unconditional affection whether I want it or not.  I bought a comfy new bed which is amazing! I have a (sort of) job with one of my best friends which gives me purpose and satisfaction.  I have pizza!  I actually get out of bed now, at least on most days.  I’m trying to believe that my panic attacks are not actually going to kill me.

And even though I’m stable, I’m ready for a change.  I want to try to be a better version.  I want to try to move forward and maybe even hope for the beginning of an upward trend in my bipolar.  To that end I’m going to talk to my psychiatrist about making a couple of medication changes.  I’ve been doing a lot of research, and I think there are two medications that I haven’t tried that sound very promising.  Although it will be a slow process I’m willing to give it a try for the potential positive outcome.  I’m looking forward to it.

I may have bad days.  I may have ok days.  I may have better days.  Today is a better day.  That doesn’t mean tomorrow will be, but I will take it a day at a time and try to remember the small things.  After all, small things matter…a lot.